決意表明

前回、最後にブログを書いたのが２か月前～(*´з`)　一度期間が空くと、再びとっかかるのが億劫になるのは、ダイエットと同じで、自分もやっぱりそうなったか～。

仕事が忙しいというのと、心に余裕がなかったためブログを書く気持ちにならなかったけど、改めて自分の会社での存在意義は何なのか考えた結果、やっぱり英語力だという事を再確認。もちろん、十分な英語力が現在あるわけではないのだが、英語での表現力、日本語力をこれからも勉強し続けるという努力が必要だと再認識した。

なので、毎日なんでもいいし、１文でもいいから、このブログを続けようとここに決意表明します！

Express my Determination., 

It has pasted more than two months since my previous posting of article. To resume to write an article again after long time interval is difficult like a diet because it is dauting and I was busy for learning a lot of new thiings at my job that seems to be a just excuse, I think. But, Now I think again about one thing : Why I was able to be hired by this company. My strong point. It is English ability. (Of course, as you know, as you see this article, my English is poor and in progress.)My company expect me to continue to improve skill up of English abilty like expression,  conversation, translation based on my job knowledge. That is why I determined here now. I will continue this blog every day evern one sentence per day. This is my express of my resolution. Please see if post tomorrow. 

勤務２日目

勤務２日目が終了。期待や製品知識習得へのプレッシャーから一日中、ガチガチにパソコン画面とにらめっこして、今日は疲れた。少し鬱っぽくなって、家に帰って慌てて精神安定剤を飲んだ。今日も製品研修。製品が難しく、分からない事だらけ。本当にわかるようになるのか不安。焦らずやればいいんだよと言ってくれる人もいれば、だらだらやっているとあっという間に時間は過ぎるから、バリバリやらないといけないという人もいる。おまけに今日は社長から質の高い仕事をするようにという言葉をもらって、それがやけに頭に残って、余計に製品や業界の事を早く覚えなければと、焦りに拍車をかけた。今は非常に辛い時期だというのは分かる。この記事を後で読み返した時、こんなこともあったな～という日が早く来ないかな。

It was 2nd working day today. I had been staring at PC screen to absorb knowledge for product and business field whole the day and so tired with a little bit depression due to pressure. I took tranquilizers soon after getting back home. Today, I  had product training and was confused and got nervous since the product was too difficult to understand and too much things to understand for me. I am worrried if I could truly understand the product someday. Actually, some other seniors told me that you should not learn everything and should not be in a hurry and it was inevitable to take long time until you could understand, while others say that you are already old age so you do not have time left too much, you should in a hurry. Furthermore, today, president said me that you should work with good quality because you get money, which made me hurry more and more. I can understand that it is hard time now. I want to look back on this article as soon as possible in a peacefull atomosphere and confident attitude. 

新しい会社での勤務初日 ～自分への誓い～

昨日、金曜日が新しい会社での勤務初日。ついに新しい生活が始まった。前日は一日中落ち着かず、夜は興奮と緊張で眠れそうになかったので、精神安定剤と睡眠薬を飲んで無理やり寝た。初日なのに、京王線が人身事故で３０分の遅延。余裕をもって行ったから遅刻はしなかったけど、初日から焦った～。中央線が人身事故ばっかりで遅延に巻き込まれたくないから京王線にしたのに。ま、こんなものか。さて、勤務初日は、オリエンテーション、各部署への挨拶、各部署の仕事内容の説明、製品説明、業界説明などのオリエンテーションから、自分に支給されたパソコンのセットアップ、メールで関係各位にご挨拶メール、時間が空いたら製品の本やカタログを見て勉強などをした。みんな気さくな人が多い印象だけど、少人数精鋭会社を謳うだけあって、みんな、その道のエリートのオーラを漂わせていた。そして挨拶メールに返信してくれた人からの言葉には、とにかく期待しているという言葉が目についた。近くの神社にお参りしたけど、自分がこれから毎日努力し続ける事を誓った。後はGod bless youだけ。

Yesterday, it was first working day at my new company. I have just started my new work life. All the day before yesterday, I could not relax and got nervous all the day. Furthermore, I could not sleep well without a tranquilizers and sleeping pills. yesterday morning, Keio line was 30 minutes late due to accident involving person injury or death. Although I could make it on time, I felt rushed and frastrated a little bit. By the way, what I could do was orientation including greeting for all department members, lectures about products, company history and business relationship with manufacturers and what each department does. After finishing orientation, I set up my own PC and emailed to all members for greetings and studied about product etc by reading the business book or catalogu. I felt othere workers looked like gentle and kindly and helpful at the same time felt aula from them seemed elite. I found that there were so many phrases like " we expect your skill, growth and contribution to company. I felt so strong pressure. But I have to continue to study and learn everything to become matured and professional for my work. I promised to do it to myself. 

単発バイト終了

新しい会社入る前の３週間で５回単発バイトをやると決めて昨日がその最終日。

終わりました！たった５回なんだけど、一日８時間、肉体労働をするってことがこんなにも辛く、大変な事なのかと実感しました。これを毎日やる人ってすごい！若いからできるとか、そういう問題でもない気がする。昨日は真夏日に近い暑さで、倉庫内だからもちろんクーラーもないし、そんな中、一日中、缶だしというビールケースをひたすらコンベアベルトの近くに置く仕事。暑さもあって最後の方は少し熱中症になったみたいで、手が震えてくるし、ぼっとしてくるし、足腰が悲鳴を上げていて、ぎりぎりの力を振り絞って最後は運んでいた。残業できる人という呼びかけにも、もはや手を上げる力は残されていなかった。でも終わった後の爽快感、達成感、開放感。ご褒美に回転すしで軽く食べた。美味しかったなー！さあ、これから本業だ！

Yesterday, it was last day to work as temporary worker before entering new company. I really could feel that working physical labor for more than 8 hours was severly hard for body. I respect anyone who work it as main job. I think that youth has nothing to do with the suitability for this job. It was heavy condition for worker since we worked without an air conditioner under the conditon of about 30 degrees. My responsibility was  "Can dashi" : to raise and put heavy beer cases all the day. In the last time, I seemed to get heatstroke a little bit and my legs were so tired, I had stiff back and waist and hands was shaking. My power was almost out of limit. When called who can work overtime, my hand could move. After finishing work, I felt a feeling of freedom, excitement and happyness. I gave Sushi to me as reward. It was very delicious.  Next, my new career is time to start. 

不安定な心 転職初日が近づいてきた

来週の金曜日から新しい会社で働き始める。刻一刻とその時を迎え、一日一日がほんとうに一瞬のように過ぎていく。派遣のバイトがない日は、カフェやマックで新しい仕事に関係する実務本を読んで予習するが、その内容がハードで、２回、３回読んでも頭にす一っと入ってこないような内容に焦ったり、不安になる。本当に業務についていけるのか。期待されすぎて、あとで自分の実力を見破られがっかりさせられないか。解雇されないか。入る前から弱気になってしまう。そうこうしているうちに気分が悪くなり、ぼーとしてきて、倦怠感、だるさが体を蝕み始めたので、薬を慌てて飲む。しばらくすると眠気が襲い、昼寝をする。昼寝から覚めるとさっきまでの鬱っぽさが消え、心が晴れ渡り、すがすがしい気持ちになれる。本当に薬がないと生きていけないと実感できる瞬間。次の会社、仕事が軌道に乗り、薬がいらないと言える日が来るまで、あとどのくらいかかるのか。

Next week's Fridey has been approaching day by day. I will start working at new company. Other than working days as temporary worker, I has been preparing for new job by studying computer literacy and how-to book relating to the job., But the how-to book is hard to understand, which makes me uneasy and frustrated about upcoming job and I am worried about whether I could keep up with the work or not. Or I might make company stuff disappointed after they see through my real skill. Or they might fire me. I feel nervous before starting new career. I felt bad, physical weariness and melanchory. I soon took tranquilizers. After that, soon I felt sleep and took a nap and woke up. I felt comfortable and got well much. Everything was clear.  It was moment when I cannot live without medicine. I wonder how long I need to live without taking tranquilizers. 

ビール工場で働いた後のラーメンとビールは格別

会社が始まるまで、派遣バイトを５回やると決めて働き始め昨日は３回目。某ビール工場でビールの箱をコンベアに載せる仕事。そして別の派遣スタッフがビールを手に取りコンベアから流れてくる商品ケースにビールを詰める流れ。３本ずつを詰めるペースならまだ余裕があるんだけど、４本づつ詰められるとこちらのペースが間に合わず、煽られてしまいきつかった。それでも昨日の現場はしっかり休憩も取らせてもらえるし、ビール箱もそれほど重くないので、これまでの中で一番働きやすかった。人間余裕がでると他の派遣スタッフと談笑もできる余裕が生まれる。昨日は仲良くなった人もいて楽しかったと言えるな(^^)/　仕事が終わってラーメンの話、特に二郎の話をしていたら急に二郎系が食べたくなって、八王子駅のインスパイア系の田田でラーメンを食べた。雨で寒かったので、本当に美味しかった。疲れた体を濃いめの味付けのニンニクスープが心と体を癒してくれた！そして、コンビニで今日一日中運んでいたビールを買って家で晩酌。肉体労働してしょっぱいラーメン食べた後のビールは最高！

There are only 2 days left for working as temporary worker until I start to work as full-time worker. Yesterday  I worked at Beer factory. My role was to set a box of beer on the conveyer belt and another staff take a few can of beer from the box and put them onto the product case. It was no sweat for me in case that another staff take up to threes of canned beer, But in case of four, I couldn't afford to set beer case onto the belt. It was hard for me. Even so, the working condition was so good and comfortable working place and persons. I didnot feel any stress and I could get along with one staff talking lots and went back together talkiing with ramen. So I felt like stopping by Ra-men Jiro shop. I ate ra-men at DenDen near Hachiouij station. It was so saulty and thick soup with ginger and garlic which gave me energy and stamina. I could recover. And I wrapped up today by drinking beer same as one I brought all the day today. It became memorable taste. 

下唇流血事件

今日は災難というか、近くのバス亭で息子と二人でバスをベンチに座って待っていた所、息子が顔を上げた時、偶然自分の口もとが息子の頭とガチンと当たり、口から顎の辺りの痛みがひどく、うずくまってしまった。そして見ると、唇からポタポタ血が地面に滴り落ちている。流血が止まらない！　びっくりするほど次から次へと真っ赤な血がポタポタポタポタ地面に落ち、あっという間に地面が真っ赤に染まってしまった。

この光景を目の当たりにし、自分をせめてしまったのか息子は怖さで泣いてしまった。

タオルで口を押えてしばらくしたら流血は収まったけど、鏡で見ると、下唇がぱっくり割れていた。あとで聞いたら母親も同じ経験があり、唇を切った時の流血に驚いたという。

Today was unlucky hit me. I waited for bus coming at nearest bus stop from my house with my son. We were siting on the bench. After a while, when he raised his face, my jaw got bumped with his head and felt strong pain around my mouth and jaw and crouched down. I found heavy bleeding from my lower lip. Blood was dripping on the ground one after another. It didn't stop to make the ground red. My son who saw this scene was so scary and blamed himself for this happening and cried loudly. After a while, the bleeding could stop by using towel put onto my mouth. I found a severe cut on my lower lip. I talked to my mother about it. It turned out that my mother did same thing and said to me, She also was shocked to see how much amount of bleed was dripping.